Friday, July 9, 2010

Commentaires and Colonoscopies!

I am having fun with the colors of the fonts. I am thinking this one may be kind of hard to read, but I am kind of a zork head right now, and to me it just looks pretty.

Ok, today, the day I have been looking forward to, I have been waiting for, I have been dreaming about....it is over.....the dreaded colonoscopy! I know, everyone who has had one says the prep is the worst, and since I have had about 5 or more of them over my life time, I agreed, (until today).
I won't (funny right this moment the guys from "two and a half men" are doing a commercial for a colonoscopy right now)....anyway, I won't go into details here, cuz that would just be wrong.....but the meds that I were so looking forward to, the ones that give you that blissful sleep.....apparently no longer work for me. I was awake (more or less), and feeling every painful inch of that hose! Even the doctor apologized when he came in to tell me he found nothing (yeah for that)...but now I am thinking.....why the heck did he go on with it, when I remember begging him to stop.

Years ago, i had one and was totally awake, just a little valium to calm me down, and it didn't hurt like this one. I wonder if now that they are used to having being be out, so they don't feel it, they get a little more rough. Anyway, it hurt like hell, it is over, and he said I don't need another one for 10 years!!!! For that I am very happy!!!

Ok, really didn't like that color, so here is the rest of the story...what ever that may be? Now, I only have one more visit to another doctor, and they will hopefully put this all together and find out what this is i am going through. I hate to say this, and I know it will sound negative, but: I am thinking they are going to find nothing diagnosable....again! This seems to happen every two years or so. I get really sick, my lab work gets all wacky and then suddenly gets better. Then we are left to the head scratchin' I am kind of surprised my doctor still has a whole head of hair! This last one was the most serious set of symptoms I have experienced to date, but I think it will be chalked up to another case of maryitis. Yes, I am just allergic to myself! what a thought huh?

Too bad there is not a sexy nature to this as there is to young college women, i could make money..."immune system gone wild"....it is like every two years, my immune system goes on this vacation, it eats everything in site, has a huge old party, and does not clean up after itself. Then whatever parts of my body that is left to clean up after them, just decides that is a good time to go on strike. So there, that is what is going on....have not idea what that would be in doctory terms, but I bet that is it. I can see it, all those little beer cans, drink umbrellas, drug paraphernalia, dirty wet beach clothes......the kidneys just say WHOA WTF? I am out of here, I am going on a mediation retreat, leave me alone, I just want to sit her and not have to process anything....I will just watch it all going by, like the clouds. Yep, that is what is going on in my body. And like I said, to bad some B rate film maker wouldn't think that would be fun and sexy for all of us to watch, and make a film, and then I could get rich.....I mean, besides a kick ass social worker...i can't think of what else I got out of this last experience!

Another topic, another color: so, after the dreaded colonoscopy....what should I do, but have my friend drive me to the art store, and I got lots of materials (free mind you) to start doing more of the yarn paintings. Well, not all of it was free, but I have got a great discount on all aspects of getting the materials. I bought the "yarn" (which I put in quotes as it is not really yarn, but I will leave you in suspense until the first piece come out), and got a huge discount on it (just because the woman and counter decided at that moment to be nice, she took off $7.00 from the total price, so instead of 16.00 of materials, I only paid $7.00!!!! Then, I went to get the wax, because the wax I thought i could use, was not 100% beeswax (I did batik for years, so I have lots of that around here), so when I went to the counter, the guy said "Wow, we just put this on sale, it is 20% off! Then the biggest coo ( not sure if that is how that is spelled), I was standing there and they carried a whole huge big trash bag full of mat board parts by me, and headed toward the trash. WAIT!!! "is that going to the trash?" So, guess what came to me for no money? he he he he.......I believe that the muses are on my side! I am so excited to get back to doing art work. How could have I ignored this part of me for so long? Maybe why i am sick. maybe if i can go back to being creative in action, not just thought.....maybe those body parts will not think they have to go on a kick ass party ever so often just to get their ya ya's out. Maybe, just maybe, they will be so happy, they will all work together and the healing will be begin. Lets hope!


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